Your boobies, bangers, bee stings, fried eggs, milky orbes..
Whatever your name for them, please check!
It was a few days before I had finished feeding Piglet.
There had been the recent show, The Full Monty, the ladies night, all about breast cancer awareness, also a campaign I had seen on twitter, it was a diagram of what a lump could feel like… it mentioned a lemon seed! All of this was completely fresh in my mind..
While in the shower, on a Friday night, I was like, OK lets check! After a few minutes, I noticed a Lump.. and it felt like a lemon seed! but not only that, it was sore, it was uncomfortable.
In that moment, I froze, suddenly I was met by complete over thinking, thoughts of please no…
I immediately told Martin, who looked worried but kept that strong, rock like figure, that he always is for me.
I did think, oh no! I cant wait until Monday to go to the GP, All the what ifs.. going through my head, If you’ve seen my previous post on Anxiety, I have a tendency to over think, over worry and make myself completely freak out!
I was able to book to see a private GP on a Saturday, so that’s what we did!
I sat in the waiting room, every single worse case scenario running through my head, it was made worse by the fact it would be a male doctor… why on earth that matters, I’ve given birth with a male doctor ‘right there’ but my initial reaction was complete embarrassment.
I was called in, he was such a lovely Doctor that he instantly put me at ease, not to mention I had all the motley crew with me.
He asked numerous questions, I explained that I was nearing the end of breastfeeding and that I felt silly for even being there.
I laid on the bed and he examined me, much to the laughter of Monkey who found this all very amusing, and obviously didn’t understand what mummy was doing.
The doctor said in his opinion, he felt that nothing seemed suspicious, but he couldn’t decide if it was a cyst or not, so said he would refer me.
I remember having a sense of feeling relived, at least for that day!
Within the next week, I received an appointment to be seen by a consultant, hubby and piglet came along, luckily monkey had nursery.
Again the consultant was a lovely man, (not sure why I keep clarifying this) maybe that lots of women feel odd when a man is involved in personal areas of your body, but just to say, there is nothing to worry about, that’s what they see and check, day in day out, you are no one special.
Again I was asked numerous questions, he check both breasts, arms up, arms down, etc, he asked me to show where the lump and soreness was.
He too didn’t feel it was anything to worry about, but for his own peace of mind and to check it wasn’t a cyst, he said he would get a scan booked for me.
Although both doctors so far, had no worries at all and this was all purely for clarification, I felt so anxious, every thought going through my mind, even going over things with my husband, if we were to hear anything negative, which my husband immediately refused to do..
Why do we do that!, straight away look to the negative, worry about things we have no certainty over?
That week, I remember, I kept checking, was it getting bigger, did it hurt anymore, what, how, when….
The appointment for the scan came through, again Hubby and Piglet came, the walk to the room, I could feel myself getting hotter and sweaty, just what you want before, having your boobs checked.
It was a lovely, kind lady, I laid on the bed, exactly the same set up when you go for a scan when pregnant, just this time I had no top or bra on…. she put the gel on my boob and began to scan, it felt so odd, having the scan on my boob, when months back it was for my growing bump.. the lady and I joked about this and she totally put me at ease.
They didn’t do a mammogram, due to my age, as the tissue and lots of changes are still happening, so a scan is the preferred way.
She remained silent, and would pause and look at the screen, at those snippets, I was worried she was going to tell me something completely different to the two doctors before her..
She then went on to say all done…! I cannot see anything, no cyst, not even the ‘lump’ I had felt in the first place, nothing was deemed suspicious to her at all.
She said that I had done the right thing and if anything ever feels not quite right, to always get checked.
I had this huge feeling of relief and all anxiety leaving my body!
I felt the need to post this, because normally I would of let my head do the talking, to tell me, I was being silly, or nothing to worry about. But things could of been different, and for lots of women they are very much that…
We all need to check, mothers, daughters, sisters even our husbands and sons.
It should be something we all put into our routines, like brushing our teeth, its important to know your body and to get Checked any time you do not feel something is right!
These #tittees are fabulous, 25% of sales are donated to GIRLvsCANCER’s Partner Charities.
If you are interested in the T shirts & some of the money going to beat cancer, take a look here
(This was a purchase off my own back, I have not been paid, nor gifted this T shirt)
If you want to see the campaign that made me check, please see here